Turn a fetish into a healthy way to explore sexuality

Turn a fetish into a healthy way to explore sexuality

Turn a fetish into a healthy way to explore sexuality

Men and women find an array of things pleasurable. A kiss on the neck, or a whisper in the ear can be enough to get their most people’s juices flowing. For others, it’s a fetish — a particular object or situation that get’s their fires burning.

Fethishism isn’t a new term in the world of sex, but it has become less taboo than in previous years. Erotic or sexual fetishism is defined as the sexual arousal a person receives from a physical object, or from a specific situation. The object or situation of interest is called the fetish; the person who has a fetish for that object/situation is a fetishist.

When couples share a fetish, it can be a healthy way for them to explore their sexual desires, find out what pleases them and can even bring them closer together. When both partners are willing participants in the fetish and communicate their desires as well as their boundaries, it can strengthen their relationship.

Many fetishes are common, although they are rarely spoken of in polite company, due to societal stigma and fear of reproach, criticism and/or shame.

6 common fetishes

Podophilia is the arousal to feet. Ladies might be reminded of the episode of “Sex and the City” when Charlotte buys a pair of shoes and the salesman asks her to try them on. He later offers her a pair of shoes if he can put them on her feet for her. He visibly expresses the gratification he receives from putting them on her feet, and she feels awkward that she’s participating in his fetish.

A lot of times, the fetishist enjoys simply looking at, touching or massaging feet, other times they can go as far as sucking on the toes and even having their genitalia stroked and caressed by feet. It may sound strange to some but to others it’s completely a normal and natural part of their sexual experience, and with an open and understanding partner, can be pleasurable for both people involved.

BDSM is the acronym encompassing a variety of fetishes consisting of four distinct types that can be can be practiced using any combination of the four:

  • Bondage – Arousal by the act of tying up or restraining someone or being tied up or restrained. Ropes, leather, chains, harnesses and even silk scarves are popular accessories used in the bondage fetish.
  • Domination/Submission – Arousal by the act of surrendering control (submitting) by one person to another person who assumes control (dominates). Submissives are often referred to as “bottoms” and dominants are referred to as “tops.”
  • Sadism – Arousal to causing physical and psychological pain. Sadists often employ spanking, pinching and other methods to inflict physical pain on their partners. Toys such as whips, chains, clamps and riding crops are just a few of items sadists employ.
  • Masochism – Arousal to experiencing physical and psychological pain. Sadists and masochist need each other in order to engage in their fetishes. The term Sadomasochism is the combination of the two words.

BDSM is often practiced as a lifestyle. Couples and singles, alike, often have designated closets or rooms for BDSM equipment. The book, 50 Shades of Grey, illustrates a BDSM relationship, although the submissive in the book isn’t as willing as most, to be tied up and/or spanked. Trust is the major factor involved in BDSM relationships. Without trust, a BDSM relationship cannot last. Partners in the relationships set clear boundaries that they trust their partners not to cross and in doing so, they create a strong relationship. Another example of a “dom/sub” relationship is shown in the movie, Secretary.

Urophilia is the arousal to urine or urinating others. This particular fetish is one that fetishists keep under wraps from most people including their partners. Ladies might remember another episode of “Sex in the City” where Carrie dates a Senator who asks her to urinate on him. She tells him she’ll think about it and avoids drinking water when they go out together.

Urophiles often in enjoy this fetish while in the shower. Although the idea of urine can be a turn-off to many, urine is a sterile byproduct of the human body

No Sex Involved

A lot of times fetishes don’t involve sexual intercourse, although they may lead to sexual gratification. For instance, bondage is often practiced fully clothed. The bound person, can be dressed in a suit, designed for bondage or restrained or tied up in their every day clothing. Foot fetishists just need a barefoot to indulge in their fetish. All other clothing can remain in pristine condition on the foot’s wearer.

Healthy exploration

Although these fetishes might seem unthinkable to some, they are practiced by many in one form or another. These fetishes allow those involved to explore their sexual desires and preferences to discover what works for them.

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