Every relationship has its up and downs. One week you can’t seem to get along and the rest of the year you’re the poster couple your friends idealize. You go an entire month without physical contact, then for the few days you can’t keep your hands off each other. But when you find yourselves having more downs than ups, it might be time to seek couples therapy. Here are five signs to figure if you do.
Lack of Communication
Communication is the cornerstone of every relationship. Without it couples become distant and it can seem as if they are simply co-existing. According to Dr. Donna M. White, LMHC, “When couples become more like roommates than a married couple, this may indicate a need for counseling.” Communication might be one of the easiest problems to fix within a relationship. With the help couples therapy, communication issues can be resolved quickly.
Lack of Trust
Perhaps the most important component of a relationship is trust. If there is a lack of trust between partners, the relationship is almost certainly doomed. Without trust, communication can and more than likely will become negative, arguments ensue, and feelings become hurt. Unfortunately, trust issues may have been present in one or both partners before they entered into the relationship, in which case, it may or may not be harder to overcome them. According to Dr. Marie Hartwell-Walker, getting to the bottom of the issue with the help couples therapy is only way to overcome lack of trust issues.
When one or both members in a couple have strayed or has even considered straying, therapy may absolutely be necessary. If both members want to continue the relationship, but have found themselves (emotionally or physically) in the arms of another, relationship therapy may just be the only way salvage and improve the relationship. Overcoming a serious betrayal such as infidelity may not be easy but with the aid of couples therapy, it is possible. Teresa Maples, LMHC, says “If you knew how to fix your problems, you would have already done it. Instead, allow a professional to help you build a more mutually satisfying relationship.”
Arguments in every relationship over the course of time, and the longer a couple together, the more likely they are to have an argument or two, but when arguing occurs all day, every day, it may be time to seek relationship therapy. There is no reason to argue on a daily basis and there is definitely no reason to continue the same argument time and again. If an issue continues to be the source of bickering and a resolution doesn’t seem possible, couples therapy can help break down the situation to find a resolution and bring back the peace in the relationship.
Fighting About Sex
It is very common for sex to decrease over the course of a marriage or long-term relationship. Both members may have obligations that begin take priority over love-making; children to take care of, chores to do and various other errands that keep them occupied leaving sex to fall by the wayside. Some couples simply don’t have sex or perhaps one member just is not interested in sex, which might make it a source of contention. If sex becomes the reason for constant fighting, it may be time to seek couples therapy.
All of the issues above can be overcome with serious effort on the part of both partners in the relationship. If one member person is unwilling to work on the relationship lack of communication, lack of trust and infidelity will eventually cause the relationship to crumble. Willingness to resolve the problems that led to these issues can lead to a happy and healthy relationship. Couples therapy could be just the ticket.